More Bad Waiting

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

Proverbs 13:12, New International Version

Back to the Christmas catalogs. This was even a worse problem for me when I was growing up. We owned a Toy and Hobby store and we lived in the back of the store and above the store. The line between home and work was, basically none. We had dinner interrupted most nights and someone had the responsibility to go out in the store if someone came in during dinner.

This time of the year we were always getting ready for Christmas and all the Christmas Toys and Hobbies would start arriving by the truck load. We had stuff all over the place. The stuff   saw in the catalogs over the summer when we ordered for Christmas was right at my fingers. So, I had to wait from the summer until Thanksgiving to see all the things we ordered, BUT I still couldn't touch them because they were for the store.

I am bad at waiting and this was a painful experience. It was like  having your hand an inch away from the candy jar but I know I could not touch it!

Maybe this is where I developed the "bad at waiting" syndrome!

No, that is too easy.

My bad at waiting was something that was a result of me wanting to control situations and get things when I wanted them. This is not how faith works.  This is not how God intended us to be. My sinful nature allowed me to think I was in control of waiting, but I am not God is. 

If my hope is in me, then I will be disappointed. 

If my hope is in my strength, I will be disappointed. 

If my trust is in me, I will be disappointed

BUT,

When my hope is in the Lord and the  longing of the spirit arrives, I cannot take any credit for what happened. It is not me in any shape form or manner.


Lord, I long for fulfillment as the tree of life grows in the garden. Let me rest in your spirit, have your spirit fill me with your grace and be merciful on me as I trust in your for the longings of my heart.

My trust is in YOU